Friday, February 19, 2010

Here’s What’s happening …..

Today I am adding one thing....
What I am creating:

I love to work with felt. These are full jointed 4 inch bears. I hand sew all of them. I have 2 children to add to these Amish Bears. I sell them at a home market close by and to friends that want them for collections or gifts. I also make these into Victorian Bear families and Hillbilly Bear families. Creating with my hands does so much to relax me.
In My Kitchen ….
We are having a salad for lunch. I am thinking tonight will be meatloaf, mashed potatoes and a vegetable. Time will tell....
With The Children ….. Since I have no children at home I will share what I am doing with the 2 boys I home school.
Today is my day off. I am so glad. I need this rest. I have 2 boys that learn in their own way. I am doing lap books with the youngest and he loves it and learns so much. I use the computer to make the lessons include all he needs. I get spelling words from the week studies. I am enjoying this but find it takes me 2 hours to prepare for the next day. The oldest uses ACE and I can tell he is bored and at a place we may have to change this too.
What I’m Reading …
I am still in the book "A Circle of Quiet" by Madeline L'Engle.
I am reading again: "The Committed Life...Principles for Good Living From Our Timeless Past".
By Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis.
What I Have Been Learning …
Where do I begin?
I have journal a lot and use both of these books....let's take the first book.....
On page 55 of "A Circle of Quiet" she says: "I have known for a long time that we know nothing about love, that we do not have love, until we give it away." She tells about how her grandma stepped up to the plate for her and was willing to give one thing she loved up.

That made me think about my life and the times people have stepped up to the plate for me. I am adopted. I grew up in a Mennonite family and love surrounded me from my dad, my grandma and Aunts and Uncles. I had good friends at Kraybill's Mennonite School too. But I always felt like I did not fit in. As a child we ask some questions and do not know the pain that goes along with our questions. Questions like "where is your real mom"? "Why did she not want you"? and more I remember. I think these kids would not remember today they asked these questions but I know where I was standing or sitting when they were asked......One day my heart was broken. I had been told at home that I was "not flesh and blood daughter" by my mom the evening before and I ran to the classroom from the playground. My favorite teacher Mrs. Murphy was there and took me into her arms and comforted me. I told her about the night before and that the teasing outside. I remember her just holding me but I knew she was thinking and praying....I do not remember all she said that day but I remember some.....One point was I should not live in the hurt the kids were dishing out to me. If I allowed the hurt and dwelled on it than they won. Mrs, Murphy had a real sense of humor and she told me to stand tall and tell them to "bring it on" because it was coming any way....that is how kids are. She talked to the kids making fun and that meant the world to me. She was and still is one of the heroes in my life!
On The Back Burner of My Mind ….
This leads me to the second book...."The Committed Life....". The author is a Jewish lady and through this book I have come to understand the Torah more. I was given this book after we lost all our "stuff" in the mold mess. It helped me pick up and go on. It has so much wisdom in it about life. So I picked it up again.....(It stays in my Bible Study basket) I flipped to page 209 to the "If Only" chapter.
"......It is futile and self-destructive to dwell upon the if-onlys or I-should-haves. Futile because what was you cannot undo, and self-destructive because such thoughts consume your energies and make you depressed. There is a Talmudic teaching that we should all remember--'What was,was'. In other words, we have to forget the past, get on with it, and learn to deal with the here and now."
How true this is.....and so I opened my Bible and read this:
Isaiah 43:18-19 English Standard Version "Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old.Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert."
And this one:
"But one thing I do: forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus" - Philippians 3:14

I am moving on!
In The Deepest Darkest Recesses ….

This picture to me says it all....I took it the morning before our last big snowfall. It is a picture I see over and over each morning there is a sunrise.... This time I wanted to catch the dark background and show the contrast of the new morning light......Each day I see this I am reminded that even in the midst of troubles there is the promise of light....we just have to look up to see it. Look at the colors it brings with it.....what beauty! Do you take the time to see all the colors around you. When you do you will feel delight and joy!

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